Toad-less Post

Post-less Toad? Poad-less Toast? WHAT? I don't know either.

All I know is, this post is not about Toad.


I generally don't tend to use the blog to rant about random things but today, I make an exception. Today, I feel the need to write about a. what a dork I am and b. Elevator Button Syndrome.


Today, I needed to run a couple of errands. One of these was at the mall. So off I went, thinking I was being terribly clever by heading out early, I would get there right when it opened so I could avoid the insane traffic that always seems to exist there. Dork move #1? Mall opens at 11am on Sundays, not 10am as it usually does. It was 10:30, fine, I'll wait. So I did, in my car, as it is cold and raining today in a stark contrast to yesterday's phenomenally warm and sunny weather. At 10:55 I decide to make my way to the doors again. This time there are quite a few other people who are waiting too. I am going to come back to this later.

It is pretty chilly and wet, and it isn't until about 11:07 that someone finally opens the doors. We head in and I make my way to the store I need to go to. It is still closed. Hmmmm. Looking around, I notice many of the other stores are also not open yet. Though a couple are. Seems odd. So, I find a place to sit and wait. 11:20 and it's still not open. This is annoying but it's also starting to make me worry - as most of the other stores were not opening either. There ARE other people in the mall, though. At this point, a security guard comes by, tells me he doesn't think that the store I'm waiting for is open today. I tell him it's supposed to be... he says... "but it's Easter." Oh. Dude. Wow. Do I feel like a moron. He says, yeah, the only places he knew of in the mall that were open today are the movie theater, the restaurants, and only a handful of the retail stores. I am clearly not the only one who was clueless today, but that doesn't make me feel any better.

Sigh. So, I head back out to my car, and drive across the street to my other errand desination, which, is also closed. Fantastic.

So that was a lovely waste of time because I am an enormous dork. I refuse to take all the blame for this, though, there are places (namely, grocery stores and restaurants) open today, as there are most holidays here. Lesson learned - unless it's food, since apparently nothing will keep us from our food, check first.

Ok, now that you all feel better about yourselves because you didn't do that (I'm here to help, what can I say?) back to the waiting for the mall to open. Perhaps I was destined to do what I did so that I could write about this... 

As I mentioned, there were quite a few of us standing outside waiting for the mall to open. It was not quite 11am yet. It was rainy, and cold. Other people came along as we were waiting. Then this happened - one of the people in a group that arrived at this point, looked around at all of us standing in the rain and shivering, pushed past everyone to get right up to the doors, and tried to open them. At first I was somewhat amused by this. Then really just dumbfounded. Someone else showed up and did the same thing. REALLY? Yes, really. So, what, exactly, is the thought process here??? Bunch of people standing around outside the mall doors in the rain just before opening time.... for fun? This is a perfect example of what I like to call, Elevator Button Syndrome. Because it happens there too. You know you've seen it. You may have even done it. Waiting for an elevator, someone will inevitably show up, and, despite the fact that the button is lit to indicate that it has already been pushed, they will push. it. again. They will. I don't think I've ever been waiting for an elevator when this hasn't happened. This is human behavior at its most self-centered. Because there can only be two explanations here. 1. The person doing this is completely oblivious to everyone and everything else around them or 2. they actually think that somehow, no one else did it right. Or enough. Or in that special, magic way that only THEY have of pushing that elevator button to make it do their bidding. I so badly wish I had the nerve to ask someone when this happens, what they were thinking. Because I want to hear the answer. I want you to tell me exactly, why, you pushed that button or tried to open that door, when it was clear that it had already been pushed, or, that the door is locked because the mall is not open yet, hence the reason we are all standing out here in the first place. TELL ME!

I can tell you that the one woman who tried to open the obviously locked mall doors this morning was in the #2. group. I watched her. She arrived with her significant other and a child in a stroller. They looked around at the group of us, looked at the doors. She got what I can only describe as a disgusted look on her face. She made her way past everyone to the door. She looked at the hours clearly posted on them that say it won't be open until 11am today, and it was about a minute or so to go. She looks at the rest of us once more, as though we were a bunch of idiots who simply didn't know how to open a door, and she tries to jam her hand in between them (they are the automatic ones, that slide open when you get close enough). Of course nothing happens. She tries AGAIN. Maybe she was just getting her special door-opening powers warmed up the first time... yeah, no. Still doesn't open. SHOCKING. I had to laugh.

Of course I wasn't laughing very long since I'd shown up to a mostly closed mall on Easter Sunday...

But still.