And it's not as tasty as bacon. Just sayin'.
Lately irony has been present in abundance here on the Planet and it seems to have developed a bit of an attitude to boot. Like, maybe-I-should-be-wearing-a-cup-because-it-fights-dirty, attitude. Don't ask me what the cup would be protecting, exactly, I haven't worked out all the details yet.
I think it started the morning that Zeke died. After tucking his little bird-body in to a shoe box filled with a few of his toys and a couple of Zach's old t-shirts, I was sorting through the mail. In it was a reminder card from the vet that Zeke was due for his annual check-up.
Told you it was playing dirty...
Then Christmas comes along. I've been in a bit of slump with the writing for a few months, lost my edge, humor, spark - whatever it is you think I have lost, you're right, I'm totally aware of it. The more I think about it, the worse it seems to get. So I was trying to be very casual about it. Um, if you can be casual about writer's block. Whatever, I was pretending I was cool with it, that's all that matters! Christmas morning I opened the gift my father sent me - it was 3 books... all about being and becoming a writer. And bless him, it's a wonderful gift, I love him for it. But I can't even look at them right now.
Then of course there's just irony flying all over the damn place as far as Josh goes. I've already talked about the Big One. NO, not his belly. You know, that whole down-slide in to the depths of hell just needing us to increase the medicine we'd spent all last Spring decreasing to bring him back? After we'd spent 6 months trying everything else we could think of? Yeah. That.
Tied in with that whole deal, were a few things. First? Risperdal seemed to also help his behaviors. But he's apparently so allergic to it that he ended up with hives, from head to toe, for many weeks.
The other meds we tried, including the Zyprexa, made him tired. Giving them at night helped reduce the day-time drowsiness but it also made him sleep through the night. Every night. The. Whole. Night. And soundly too, I could actually cut his nails again. At the same time, I have been working on getting more sleep myself - if you have been here since early on, you might remember my post about sleep and the lack thereof http://planetjosh.squarespace.com/journal/2010/4/7/sleep-is-for-the-weak-see-also-how-i-managed-to-create-my-ow.html Well, I was finally managing to get to bed at much more reasonable times (like, before 1am) and was like, yay! my doctor and my family can stop yelling at me now, and hey, I actually LIKE getting more sleep... Josh's sleeping through the night so consistently was helping a lot. I felt much more comfortable turning in knowing that he wasn't likely to wake up. And then we took him off the hard stuff, and increased the old stuff. (Stuff. Because that's the technical term for it, don't argue with me!) Which brought Toadie back and for that I will be thankful forever. The irony of it is, that he is no longer sleeping. Like, at all. Well, he managed most of last night, though, he was up late and woke up once, but I got him to settle again. For the last 2 weeks, he's been up every. single. night. Which means I have been too. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change anything right now, he's been SO great, it's amazing (we actually drove by a McD's last week, without stopping to get him fries, and he didn't make a sound. Not a peep. He just happily engrossed himself in his i-Pad.... I mean, wow, just WOW...) so this is not a complaint! It's just, well, it's IRONIC AS ALL HELL, that's all.
And just to top it all off, because Irony knows my weak spots and goes after them like a dingo on a baby, the one day I manage to get everyone out of the house and into the car at a time that should have meant I would not be my usual 2 minutes late getting Josh to school, there was an accident that caused a big slow-down on the way to dropping Zach off. So we were 2 minutes late. Even though we'd left 10 minutes early. Irony, it seems, finds math hard.
On the bright side, Zach made me laugh. And I made him laugh - because even though my writing is sucking like a giant Hoover these days, my live comedic abilities are apparently still intact. At least as far as he's concerned. Mind you he's the one who thinks everyone has a nice butt... on the inside... and at least when Toadie's been up at night he's been good moods for the most part. And sleep is overrated. And if I ever were to arrive earlier to Josh's school, I imagine it would throw them completely off schedule. They know how we roll.
Right? Right. So Irony can suck-it.
(I should probably go put a cup on now...)